I'm Pretty Sure My Girlfriend Hates My Guts
words and music Stephen Barling

don't know how it happened, we were doin' just fine
but she furrowed up her brow and then she started to whine
she told me i was acting like an overgrown kid
i said "that's the fun of livin'" and you know what she did?

she got uptight quickly and wrinkled her nose
and looked all sickly with her crinkled up toes
there ain't no ifs or ands or buts
cuz I'm pretty sure my girlfriend hates my guts

she said it was impossible, i can't understand
i said i'm open-minded if you lend me a hand
she said if i had cared then i would already know
but my curious indifference had started to show

i said "i've got a life" and she looked like she could die
she said "you could've fooled me," and she started to cry
i said "you know me better and you sure know me now"
she didn't say a thing, she just furrowed her brow